Approaches

The Conflict Dynamics Profile is an assessment instrument dealing with conflict behaviors in the workplace (and at home), provides a powerful way to improve self-awareness of what triggers conflict in individuals as well as how they respond to conflict. Two versions of the instrument – the CDP-Individual (CDP-I) and CDP-360 – provide practical solutions for promoting more effective conflict resolution. Based on these triggers and responses, the Conflict Dynamics Profile then provides practical approaches for improving behaviors that promote more effective workplace conflict resolution. I can work with you to translate the results of this simple yet powerful tool into learning steps that will significantly improve your ability to work constructively with conflict.

For over 10 years, I have been leading Circles of Trust® retreats in collaboration with the Center for Courage & Renewal under the guidance of Dr. Parker Palmer, internationally recognized author.

Retreats are based on the premise that when we reconnect who we are with what we do, we approach our lives and work with renewed passion, commitment, and integrity. Retreats, called Courage to Teach®, Courage to Lead® or Circles of Trust®, make use of poetry and stories, solitude, reflection, time in nature, the arts, and deep listening. They give time and space to listen to the inner voice, leading each to unfold in her or his own way. We open to the mysteries of what we don’t fully know, and in the process build a sense of community and connection with ourselves and others. www.couragerenewal.org

As a certified Integral Coach I use a developmental, integral approach. Developmental means that each of us can continue to grow and develop throughout adulthood, increasing our capacities in the many domains of life. Integral means a holistic approach that pays attention to the physical, emotional, cognitive, relational, social and spiritual aspects of life – in and out of the workplace.

My role as a coach is to help you develop new perspectives, understandings, language, behaviors, and skills that allow you to successfully address the most important issues you are facing. My job is to understand you with great depth and scope, talk with you in a way that opens up insights and possibilities, and offer a path forward that includes activities custom-designed for you. We address your inner and outer world, as well as the relationships, groups, and environments that help shape you.

We will focus on what is practical and useful so that you reach both immediate and long-term goals. We will laugh and have fun, too.

You may be surprised to find the benefits of our work showing up in many areas of your life. And, our work is designed to serve you even after our coaching program is done – increasing your skill and confidence to reflect, adapt, and grow as your life continues to unfold.

I received my initial training with New Ventures West®.
www.newventureswest.com

Polarity MapMany tough dilemmas that persist over time actually are not problems that can be solved at all. They involve a polarity – a relationship between two opposing ideas that each have some good in them. In fact, you need both sides to achieve your goals. And guaranteed, if you overdo one side, you get trouble. The good and bad news is that you can’t get rid of a polarity – ever.

Based on the work of Barry Johnson, Polarity Management  is a powerful yet very accessible model of thinking, assessing, planning and acting that moves individuals and teams from resistance and conflict towards embracing the complexity of their challenges and working together towards their common purpose. When groups learn it, they are more able to work effectively with “opposition”, build stronger teams, make better decisions, and focus their energy where it will make a bigger positive difference.

www.polaritymanagement.com

Why is it we so often are firmly committed to some behavior or change, and inexplicably find ourselves NOT fulfilling our commitment – over and over? It’s not that we are lazy or stupid or don’t really mean it. It’s often that there is a hidden “immunity” system – a set of assumptions and competing commitments that are unconsciously preventing us from taking action.

By exploring a simple yet powerful “map” of our internal immunity, and following up with an arc of self-observations and new behaviors, we can release the hold of these limiting assumptions and achieve our goals.

Developed by Harvard researchers Robert Kegan and Lisa Lahey.

www.mindsatwork.com

Many people see conflict as negative and miss the opportunity to harness the energy it contains for honesty, strengthening relationships, and positive change. When we try to completely avoid conflict, we often get the results we feared the conflict would lead to in the first place (isolation, things getting worse, hurt feelings, etc.) When we bully our way into conflict, we get the same.

Conflict skills CAN be learned. We can improve how we listen, how we think, and how we speak. When we do, we:

  • enhance the creativity and engagement of individuals and teams
  • unlock group think
  • create safety (paradoxically)
  • encourage innovation

 

Well-handled conflict becomes a rich resource of learning and and forward movement. CourageWork uses an integrated approach, including ideas from:

  • Stone, Patton, and Heen in Difficult Conversations
  • Patterson, Grenny, McMilan and Switzler in Crucial Conversations
  • Barry Johnson in Polarity Management
  • William Bridges in Transitions
  • Michelle LeBaron’s in Bridging Cultural Conflicts
  • Rick Maurer in Beyond the Wall of Resistance
  • Marshall Rosenberg Non-Violent Communication
  • Teleometrics Conflict Management Survey

Improving Skills at Discussing What Matters Most

Life is full of difficult conversations – where the topics are sensitive, the stakes high, and the outcome uncertain. Many of us put off these conversations when we can, or stumble through when we must. Anxiety, ineffectiveness, misunderstanding or hurt feelings are often the result.

CourageWork sessions on difficult conversations help you prepare for and hold your most difficult conversations in ways that achieve your objectives while strengthening relationships and minimizing damaging forms of conflict. The skills and attitudes learned apply to workplace conversations as well as conversations in your personal and family life. You learn how to decide which conversations need to happen (and which don’t) and how to be more graceful, skillful, and courageous in holding them.

I integrate ideas and practices of my own with insights from:

  • Stone, Patton, and Heen in Difficult Conversations
  • Patterson, Grenny, McMilan and Switzler in Crucial Conversations
  • Michelle LeBaron’s in Bridging Cultural Conflicts
  • Marshall Rosenberg Non-Violent Communication

For clients interested in a deeper understanding of their psychological and even spiritual “architecture”, I offer the Enneagram as a fascinating and helpful tool. It provides an easy to understand and remember practical system for increasing emotional intelligence, with insights that can be used for personal and professional development.

The Enneagram is cross-cultural and highly accurate, with many work-related applications in the following areas: communication, conflict, feedback, teams, leadership, strategy, decision making, self-mastery, coaching, and more.

The Enneagram is currently being used by organizations worldwide to help employees and leaders develop greater self-awareness and self-acceptance and to take personal responsibility for their behavior. This enables individuals at all levels in the organization to become actors in their environments rather than passive recipients. Further, the Enneagram provides specific development paths and activities tailored to each Enneagram style so that development time is spent more efficiently and results are clear and long lasting

Let me know if you would like to use the Enneagram as one element of your coaching or group learning.

For more information on the Enneagram the following have different “flavors” to their approach:
www.theenneagraminbusiness.com
www.enneagraminstitute.com
www.sandramaitri.com

For the past 16 years, I’ve been exploring various forms of mindfulness, insight meditation and somatic practices. For clients interested in grounding their work in the power of the body to inform us and the mind to settle down into clarity and compassion, I offer a variety of non-religious somatic and meditation approaches. These can help offset the stress and craziness of modern life and provide a sense of confidence, peacefulness and openness, even in very difficult situations.

I find that the deceptively simple yet effective guidelines outlined by Marshall Rosenberg in Non-Violent Communication are often very useful to clients and groups. NVC is based on the principles of nonviolence– a natural state of compassion in the heart. NVC starts with assumption that we all have access to our empathic caring. Violent behaviors—whether verbal or physical— are most often learned through and supported by the prevailing culture and they CAN change.

NVC also assumes that we all share the same basic human needs, and that each of our actions is a strategy to meet one or more of these needs (skillfully or not). When we connect with those needs in ourselves and others and communicate them well, we experience greater authenticity, increased understanding of and connection to others, and a transformation of conflict.

www.cnvc.org